Five Tips to De-stress Your Life
1. Identify what is burdening you right now. What do you hate about your life? What are you tolerating? By stating what you hate or are putting up with in your present circumstances, you can then identify what you want. As you answer this question, consider each of the categories mentioned below. Make a thorough list and be specific. This list is for your eyes only, so spill onto paper whatever you hate about your present circumstances, without trying to sugar-coat how you are feeling.
* Relationships: I hate feeling like I always have to be right. I hate how my son never wants to spend time with me.
* Health & Wellness: I hate being 20 pounds overweight. I hate getting so out-of-breath when I take the stairs. I hate that I am so stressed that I cannot fall asleep at night.
* Financial Health: I hate how I always defer my tax returns because I am so disorganized with my financial records. I hate how many tax deductions I forfeit because of my lousy record-keeping practices.
* Environment: I hate how my office is cluttered with piles of paper. I hate that I waste so much time looking for things. I hate how much money I waste because I have to buy something I have but cannot find. I hate that I cannot park my car in the garage because of all the junk stored in there.
* Work: I hate regularly working past 5 PM and on the weekends.
2. Deal with unresolved issues. Is there something in your past that you have not dealt with – psychological barriers, untreated disorders, unfinished business from your childhood, unresolved relationships, addictions, or depression? If so, seek professional assistance to clear a path for a new beginning. Without first dealing with these obstacles, you may sabotage your efforts or find major resistance to making the changes you desire.
3. De-clutter and create order. Creating order in your home and work environment may help you to gain clarity as you explore the horizon of some new directions in other areas of your life. Here's my definition of clutter: Anything you own, possess, or do that does not enhance your life on a regular basis. It’s hard to make room for something new amidst all the clutter ... whether that clutter exists in your physical environment, on your calendar, or in your head.
4. Move from complaints to solutions. Look at your list of things you hate (above), and design a vision around what you want and choose for the future. Create a chart that includes the complaints, solutions to achieve your vision, and projected dates of completion.
Tried everything and still cannot find a solution? Ask someone else to help you brainstorm a solution, or make peace with it and quit thinking of it as a problem.
Eliminate excuses that are undermining your vision. For example, if you feel like you have to work late, examine the excuses that are undermining your desire to leave the office by 5 PM. Are you staying late to catch up with e-mail or to meet deadlines? How can you eliminate the excuse? Build in time to handle those activities during regular work hours.
Commit time to take positive action. Carve out protected time for working on an important project that would otherwise not get done until the 11th hour (after hours or on the weekend). For large projects, break them into smaller "bite-sized" projects.
5. Get support as you change behaviors. In order to create new behaviors which will get and keep you at the enhanced level at which you wish to function, you may need support. An accountability partner or personal coach can help you:
* Reflect back what you say you want so you can hear yourself.
* Clarify what it will take to get you from where you are to where you want to be.
* Build in accountability check-ins (without judgment) around the actions you choose to take.
1. Identify what is burdening you right now. What do you hate about your life? What are you tolerating? By stating what you hate or are putting up with in your present circumstances, you can then identify what you want. As you answer this question, consider each of the categories mentioned below. Make a thorough list and be specific. This list is for your eyes only, so spill onto paper whatever you hate about your present circumstances, without trying to sugar-coat how you are feeling.
* Relationships: I hate feeling like I always have to be right. I hate how my son never wants to spend time with me.
* Health & Wellness: I hate being 20 pounds overweight. I hate getting so out-of-breath when I take the stairs. I hate that I am so stressed that I cannot fall asleep at night.
* Financial Health: I hate how I always defer my tax returns because I am so disorganized with my financial records. I hate how many tax deductions I forfeit because of my lousy record-keeping practices.
* Environment: I hate how my office is cluttered with piles of paper. I hate that I waste so much time looking for things. I hate how much money I waste because I have to buy something I have but cannot find. I hate that I cannot park my car in the garage because of all the junk stored in there.
* Work: I hate regularly working past 5 PM and on the weekends.
2. Deal with unresolved issues. Is there something in your past that you have not dealt with – psychological barriers, untreated disorders, unfinished business from your childhood, unresolved relationships, addictions, or depression? If so, seek professional assistance to clear a path for a new beginning. Without first dealing with these obstacles, you may sabotage your efforts or find major resistance to making the changes you desire.
3. De-clutter and create order. Creating order in your home and work environment may help you to gain clarity as you explore the horizon of some new directions in other areas of your life. Here's my definition of clutter: Anything you own, possess, or do that does not enhance your life on a regular basis. It’s hard to make room for something new amidst all the clutter ... whether that clutter exists in your physical environment, on your calendar, or in your head.
4. Move from complaints to solutions. Look at your list of things you hate (above), and design a vision around what you want and choose for the future. Create a chart that includes the complaints, solutions to achieve your vision, and projected dates of completion.
Tried everything and still cannot find a solution? Ask someone else to help you brainstorm a solution, or make peace with it and quit thinking of it as a problem.
Eliminate excuses that are undermining your vision. For example, if you feel like you have to work late, examine the excuses that are undermining your desire to leave the office by 5 PM. Are you staying late to catch up with e-mail or to meet deadlines? How can you eliminate the excuse? Build in time to handle those activities during regular work hours.
Commit time to take positive action. Carve out protected time for working on an important project that would otherwise not get done until the 11th hour (after hours or on the weekend). For large projects, break them into smaller "bite-sized" projects.
5. Get support as you change behaviors. In order to create new behaviors which will get and keep you at the enhanced level at which you wish to function, you may need support. An accountability partner or personal coach can help you:
* Reflect back what you say you want so you can hear yourself.
* Clarify what it will take to get you from where you are to where you want to be.
* Build in accountability check-ins (without judgment) around the actions you choose to take.
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